Setting Boundaries To Improve Relationships

February 17, 2023

The Importance of Setting Healthy Personal Boundaries

Setting healthy personal boundaries is essential for maintaining good mental health.


Firstly, it helps us establish a sense of self-worth and self-respect. When we set boundaries, we communicate to ourselves and others that we value our time, energy, and emotional well-being.

This helps us develop a sense of self-esteem and confidence in ourselves.

Secondly, being clear about your limits helps you to protect yourself from toxic or unhealthy relationships. When we have clear boundaries, we can identify when someone is violating them, and take steps to remove ourselves from the situation. This helps us avoid getting involved in situations that may be detrimental to our mental health.

setting boundaries creates more time and energy for you

Finally, setting boundaries helps us prioritise our own needs and goals. By setting boundaries around our time and energy, we can focus on what is most important to us and avoid getting sidetracked by other people’s demands.

How Do I Know if I Have a Problem?

  • Do you sometimes feel people take advantage of you?
  • Do you make consider others needs over your own?
  • Do you often find yourself helping and rescuing people?
  • Do you find yourself obsessing about people?
  • Are you often surrounded by drama?
  • Does setting boundaries feel difficult? Does it make you feel guilty to say no to people?
  • Are you stressed and overwhelmed?
  • Are you confused about what your limits actually are?

How to Set Healthy Personal Boundaries

Setting healthy personal boundaries can be challenging, especially if we are used to putting others’ needs before our own. However, with practice, it is possible to establish healthy boundaries that support our mental health. Here are some steps to take when setting personal boundaries:

Identify your boundaries:

Before you can set boundaries with your family members, work colleagues or friends, you need to be clear about what your boundaries are. Consider what behaviours are unacceptable to you and what you need from people in order to maintain a healthy relationship.

Decide on your limits:

Once you know what is most important to you, decide on your limits. Consider how much time, energy, and emotional investment you are willing to give to different activities or people. This will help you establish boundaries around your time and energy.

Communicate clearly:

Once you have decided on your limits, communicate them to others. Be clear and specific about what you are willing to do and what you are not willing to do. This will help avoid misunderstandings and make it easier for others to respect your boundaries.

Be firm With What You Decide Is Right For You:

Setting boundaries is only half the battle. You also need to enforce them. When someone violates your boundaries, take action to correct the behaviour. This may involve saying no, setting consequences, or removing yourself from the situation.

Practice self-care:

Setting personal boundaries can be emotionally challenging, so it is important to take care of yourself during the process. Socialise with friends, exercise, try a new hobby. 

Seek support:

setting boundaries - seek help

If you are having difficulty setting boundaries with your family members or friends, consider seeking the support of a therapist or counsellor. They can provide you with additional tools and strategies to help you navigate these difficult relationships. Click here to contact Claire to arrange a therapy consultation.


Remember that setting boundaries is an on-going process, and it may take time to establish and maintain them. But by prioritising your own well-being and taking steps to protect yourself from toxic behaviour, you can build healthier relationships over time.